Dr. Lucia Capacchione pioneered the technique of using our non-dominant hand for writing and drawing to connect with our inner child. This process activates both sides of the brain, allowing us to access emotions and memories that may be hidden or unhealed. Through this practice, we can integrate those wounded parts of ourselves and build deeper connections with others.
I discovered Dr. Capacchione’s work many years ago and use it both personally and professionally. I like to think of my inner child as having her own identity, her name is Lil Jess. She’s helped me overcome many challenges in my life, and now, as an adult, I get to help her live her best life.
The technique of non-dominant handwriting is simple, even if the results look messy. That’s okay; it’s not about perfection. I’m right-handed, so I write to Lil Jess with my left hand. Sometimes I ask her what she needs or wants; other times, I simply write freely or seek her wisdom. Over the years, I’ve learned that my inner child needs me to care for three main areas: my brain, my body, and my soul.
Caring for My Brain
My brain needs calm and peace. In a world filled with constant stimulation, finding stillness can be a challenge. By focusing on my breath, with slow inhales and exhales, I can regulate my emotions and find balance.
I enjoy using the Insight Timer app because it offers free guided meditations on a wide range of topics. One of my former therapists also recommended listening to EMDR music to help regulate my brain. I’ve found that listening to binaural beats or EMDR bilateral stimulation tracks (available on platforms like Spotify) helps me focus, especially when I’m writing or doing paperwork.
Caring for My Body
Dr. Bessel van der Kolk’s book The Body Keeps the Score has been instrumental in helping me understand how trauma affects the body. I’ve learned to notice how stress impacts my heart rate, posture, and overall well-being.
Dr. Bruce Perry is also someone who has been studying the effects of trauma on the brain for decades, and his reports find that we can rewire the brain through repetitive rhythmic activity. These movements can help rewire the brain, and include:
Locomotor movements (moving through space):
- Walking
- Running
- Swimming
- Skipping
- Galloping
Non-locomotor movements (stationary):
- Clapping
- Tapping your foot
- Nodding your head
- Swinging your arms or legs
- Dancing
Other rhythmic activities, such as drumming, singing, or playing an instrument, can also promote healing and calm. When I care for my brain and body, I notice my creativity begins to flourish, and my soul feels lighter.
Nourishing My Soul
When I allow Lil Jess to create, my soul feels alive and nourished. Creativity quiets my inner critic and helps me feel connected to myself and to others. For me, creativity takes many forms, such as writing, cooking, baking, exploring, learning, and imagining.
But creativity often follows healing. It comes after I’ve taken time to notice how my brain and body feel, and after I’ve listened to what Lil Jess needs. This process of reparenting, which means providing for my inner child what she once needed but didn’t receive, has allowed me to integrate my younger self with my adult self. It helps me find joy in the journey, even while managing the responsibilities of adulthood.
Connecting With Your Inner Child
Through non-dominant handwriting, we can each form a direct connection to our inner child. All you need is paper, a pen, and a willingness to listen.
What might your inner child want to tell you today?
Would you be willing to ask what they need or want, and take one small step toward meeting that need?
If you’d like to explore healing your inner child with professional support, the team at Family Counseling Service is here to help. Contact us today to schedule an appointment.
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